@GlennWiens April 19, 2025:
My Dearest Martha,
This means war. The boys and I are FURIOUS. Our patience has run out.
If Mark Carney is elected PM in two weeks, we are SEPARATING!!
This tyranny will not stand! We will not allow an elite COMMUNIST to ruin this country any longer!
We’ve been locked in the clubhouse for a week, watching Power and Politics and OANN and Fox News and liking posts from Kat Kanada and Rebel News on X and watching Jordan Peterson videos on YouTube and listening to old John Gormley shows and watching the FAKE POLLS on CBC and none of this makes sense. We’ve been told for three years that Poilievre is going to defeat Trudeau in the next election…well, the next election is here, and Justin is nowhere to be seen. What a coward! We told him to resign, and he did! This is bullshit! WTF?
Now, everyone is saying the dirty Libs might get in again, and our Brylcreem Jesus might actually get O’Tooled in the aftermath…that isn’t fair! We watched Pierre eat an apple like a four year old and get snippy with journalists and make weird videos and smoke hookahs with some Joe Rogan fanbois, and he even rode a horse at the Stampede…the guy is literally a based dude god! Just look at him…he is so much hotter than Turdo. We have that picture of him in the black t shirt and no glasses hanging in the clubhouse right beside the Stockwell Day-on-a-jetski poster omg that wetsuit…
Anyway, this is not what we’ve been driving across Western Canada and the United States especially Vegas protesting the woke mind virus for…we thought this was in the bag, and Canada would be great again
So, we will be separating from Canada if Carney wins.
We have no idea how to do this, but we think it starts with Dani Smith and Scott Moe doing a SOVEREIGNTY ACT, or something…basically is all you have to do is say “hey Ottawa, REFERENDUM! just like Quebec did, and BOOM we are separated, and the frogs and the Laurentian elite (whoever that is) won’t be getting anymore TRANSFER PAYMENTS from the west lol they are gunna be so mad. Also, eastern Canada, NO OIL FOR YOU and also NO CANOLA! They will be so fucked haha they will be begging us to come back, but we’ll be, like, nuh uh losers, try to make a go of it as a country with 35 million people with no pipelines, pump jacks or pistols hahaha…
they will all freeze and starve in the dark and Toronto will be begging the Buffalo Sabres to buy their hockey team and then we will do all the deals with the world’s greatest deal maker, Kevin O’Leary, and we’ll tear down all the scary windmills and solar things and use coal to power crypto-mining operations in Estevan and Yorkton and we’ll get Elon to co-sign for Kevin cuz why not?
and eastern Canadians will come to our new, awesome Western Buffalo Republic and try to get jobs, saying, please WBR, can we have something, anything (they’ll be crying a little) and we’ll say, on your knees, eastern scum! and we’ll make them be janitors or something gross
and it will serve the bastards right for taking our transfer payments and using it for childcare and infrastructure and other dumb stuff instead of funding private Christian schools and private/public parkades and provincial gestapo forces and huge lawyer fees for fuck ups
Oh yes, Martha, the boys and I are as giddy as a UCP member meeting Donald Trump…it’s like our brains have gone on a Scott Moe vacation to India and haven’t come back yet…we are free to dream again…free to dream about a country where everyone hates the same people we do..
…free to dream about a place…a big open, empty, windy, freezing fucking cold place, where we are free to pretend we are the most important fuckers on earth, and not have to worry about the yucky folks who make us, and our bible study group, uncomfortable. A place where nobody will tell us wut a bunch of whiny, bitchy, self-obsessed, self-victimized crybabies we can be when we think that other people are going on about their lives, and not thinking about how important we are and how they owe us something.
We hope the new capital city will be Moose Jaw, because Joe Rogan will prolly get a kick out of that. There won’t be any immigration, except maybe from Montana and North Dakota, because they just love us. We’ll put god back in the schools, mostly to help with algebra and there won’t be any woke Christmas plays or culty/satan stuff, except Halloween, cuz Chad’s wife makes a killing selling costumes that time of year, and the only tax will be a flat tax, whatever that is, and we’ll get someone to build billion dollar refineries.
and we’ll be the richest nation on earth, and our political leaders will be the richest on earth, and we might have to still live in a camper for a few years but it will be a big camper and that’s just the price the boys and I are willing to pay to hate Carney, Martha.
We know it won’t be easy. People will call us morons and idiots and ridiculous, self-absorbed assholes for being mad at Trudeau for turning the country we are going to separate from into a third world shithole, according to Facebook.
We are ready. We have beer, and smokes.
Now, we wait…because if Poilievre gets in, we won’t have to separate because he’ll kill the woke and make Carney cry…he’s our guy…but if he loses, we’re out of here…fuck this…we can’t even bitch about the carbon tax anymore…it’s so unfair!
Keep us in your prayers, Martha. I love you as much as I love the land your father discovered oil under…we anxiously await the next e-transfer.
Until then, I am, yours in civil war cosplay,
John
@RodKahx:
Ok, that was fucking hilarious. Well done sir.
Mama-Wife-Retiree @TwoLs60:
Brylcreem Jesus getting O’Tooled.
@RGBAtlantica:
Brylcreem Jesus
It takes one hell of a lot of gall, demented ego, hatred of one’s worshipping base, the MAGAts and Incels, and hideousness to suggest, pimp and propagandize oneself as being Jesus. And, is, as usual, not creative, Pee Pee’s just copying Trump. But, sadly it works. Life is intolerably cruel for most and made more hideous by con gov’ts the world over, decimating rights and protections, stealing from ordinary taxpayers and starting kids to give to billionaires. Many leap to believe a politician is Jesus, wanting to be saved from life’s abuses and horrors, notably those caused by rich humans:
@Ontheisle2024:
No Mini Trump to run Canada into the Ground…..No replays of the Stephen Harper years (2006-2015).
@profbenperrin:
A clear choice this election, described in today’s Financial Times:
Poilievre: “courting the far-right”, “driven by anger” “aggressive”, “reminiscent of the ‘MAGA movement”
Carney: “stable”, “antidote to Trump’s chaos and a tariff-induced recession”
@earthox.bsky.social:
I remember this one. Disgusting little man.
@gregrgay.bsky.social:
My first thought, ‘this can’t be real’. With a little searching, it is indeed. Three times over the years. Was “Happy Easter” removed on purpose? Seems to me tRump also cast himself as the chosen one.
@proudcanadian151.bsky.social:
Is this real? Did PP really post this?
@proudcanadian151.bsky.social:
Wow. He’s playing the religious stuff, just like how Trump played the Evangelicals.
NeverVotePoilievre
@normajane.bsky.social:
If you don’t think the religious right pulls string with the CPC you are delusional. Women’s rights are on the table and PP won’t answer questions about that.
Anti-Abortion Lobby Bringing Priest Who Gave Nazi Salute To Canada For Youth Conference, Calvin Robinson had his licence to provide ministry to the Anglican Catholic Church revoked after the incident by Anti-Hate.ca, March 19, 2025
… Calvin Robinson is being brought to Canada by Campaign Life Coalition (CLC) as part of its annual March for Life in Ottawa, Ontario.
… CLC describes itself as “the political arm of the pro-life movement in Canada,” though its aims are much broader. …
CLC has taken a position against abortion, birth control, in vitro fertilization, being transgender, queer and transgender rights, and feminism. …
@kenroots.bsky.social:
He’s really running Trump’s playbook isn’t he?
@bernardleclair.bsky.social:
At last, calling out PP for what he is : a liar. If Poilievre had a worthy platform he would have revealed it. Watch for the similarities in the language with the USA Republicans, “Canada is broken, he is the only one that can fix it” or “he is risen” and “Common sens Conservatives” all from Trump.
@benjamin-mom.bsky.social:
If this isn’t enough to scare the shit out to someone!!
wayneking.bsky.social:
Please provide a link to Twitter image
@benjamin-mom.bsky.social:
*newspaper advertisement
Clara McNee:
Christian values? What about ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you’? The words that Pp chooses against his political foes (everyone but his own supporters) are generally denigrating and cruel and meant to do harm whereas in a civil society political opponents generally offer up valid, valued alternative policy to attract votes.
So, if he is being supported for his Christian values, I’d say he needs some definite training and actual classes in Christian doctrine in how to behave like a Christian and valued member of an inclusive society.
His behaviour, in my opinion, is shameful and is in no way, shape or form a model for the young. We need ‘role’ models in our society so that our civil society can continue where everyone feels safe.
Jesus would not have voted like Harper’s Piss Panties votes:
Anne__Ominous:
And “freedom”? Where does a woman’s freedom to choose fit in?
puppyg:
Freedom to choose – chicken or fish, whatever hubby wants.
Clara McNee:
Their freedom seems to be ‘freedom to break rules and regulations and condemn those that chastise them for doing so’. Can’t win with that bunch.
Neil Lore:
As near as I can tell, these hateful cardboard Christians think women should be “free” to be barefoot, pregnant, illiterate chattel.
oilfan63:
Then they wouldn’t really be Christians would they?
Neil Lore:
I’m guessing you’ve never read the Bible, or learned enough about European history to know how profoundly anti-woman Christianity has been basically ever since the Romans converted from paganism to Roman Catholicism.
***
@Desertpuma:
I am curious how many Provinces may want to try and leave Canada if Carney wins
@Joshmcgill7:
A minority of Albertans will claim they want to separate, and grumble about it for the next few years but do othing meaningful about it
@intell59:
AB talks tough, but get more per capita fed spending than any other province. Oil is a sunset industry & despite UCP bravado, cons understand this & are milking it bigly right now. AB can’t & won’t separate, but their base laps it up. Not the most critical thinking electorate
@K38Tweets:
The same amount that tried to leave when Trudeau won
Albertan/Team Canada @ProudCanuckMama:
I’m an Albertan and absolutely want nothing to do with separation. I’m Canadian and will always be Canadian.
Pierre Poilievre can’t get his security clearance! @IAMSMRT1:
Just a small number of Freedumbers in a circle jerk want to leave. Most of them are so stupid that I doubt even the US would take them.
@BmurphM:
lol I swear they’re just all idiots
@audricmoses:
Zero. Not even Alberta.
@SeditiousMe:
None. Ain’t happening.
@Desertpuma:
Before the election even started there was a 40% interest in Alberta becoming Independent from the rest of Canada regardless who was the winner of the election
And of those in Alberta who expressed interest, 12% to 15% wanted to become a US State
@SeditiousMe:
How are you getting Jasper and Banff and Waterton and Elk Island and Wood Buffalo national parks from Canada? How about Indigenous reserves, and treaties?
People are not thinking about this very thoughtfully. They just want what they want.
And it ain’t happening.
Are they discerning which level of government has stewardship over each problem they face?
Many blame the feds for health care and housing woes. Those are provincial jurisdictions. But Ottawa wears it because it is easier than looking at a grade 6 textbook.
Alberta’s anti-wildlife, gross white anti-environment male ego and lust for killing, opened up hunting grizzlies, a threatened species. By the time the Jordan Peterson/Ezra Levant/Piss Pants/Corrupto Queen Danielle Smith quislings get the brain-washed hate-filled raging Alberta separatists organized into action, there will not be any grizzlies left.
Moderate Mike – Alberta Proud @CanadianModera1:
One reason for my vote is to also send Premier Smith a message.
Not all Albertans buy into her anti-Canada rhetoric & threats. Not all Albertans support her mess of a MAGA-style government.
We are out here, we are Albertans, and we Canadians.
@parker02982379:
Yes, far from it! 90% of Albertans stand with Canada. Smith and her corrupt separatist party need to GO!
@TheRealDKGray:
Can’t wait for Pierre to propose renaming the Gulf of St Lawrence to the Gulf of Stephen Harper.
@ThomasWatsonCD:
Dear lord political talk is so low brow and depressing.
People are mad PM Carney didn’t wear a Canadian flag lapel pin during the French debate.
….he was wearing his Order of Canada pin. Literally a symbol of Canada and one of its highest honours.
He was nominated by Steven Harper and awarded it by GG Johnston…who was also appointed by Steven Harper.